constable_odo | (no subject)

I guess I'm lucky to be boring enough that they didn't just lock me up, yeah.

they are too busy not catching loki again probably

maybe they've moved on to detaining children.

easier targets.

i would hope not

for their sake

I probably shouldn't give them ideas. maybe they could hire some five year old consultants. they'd probably be smarter.

i thought they could not get dumber but they are letting loki talk here

never let loki talk

I should add they already "keep track of" at least teenagers sometimes. ask me how I know this. haha. ha.

keeping track of teenagers clearly very important work

next shield project, finding out what babies are actually saying, also very important

maybe looking for library late fees also

clearly all babies are saying "down with shield" and that's why they're dangerous.

people who don't return books are a notorious threat to uh

normal upstanding citizens. or something.

babies engage in terrible dark magics

overdue library book is maybe treason we don't know

the babies are checking out library books about dark rituals. they must be stopped.

you found the real threat

congratulations you are now leader of shield

oh no don't say that, now they'll never leave me alone. on the other hand, I could just order them all into a volcano or something.

i ordered him to run into my knife. i ordered him to run into my knife /ten times/

I like your style.

order them to actually be competent

they will accidentally blow up the shipbasket somehow while attempting

can't I just order them to be dead? that sounds so much better and more likely.

shipbasket?

you could try

the giant monstrosity they fly around in

shipbasket

they have a giant thing they fly around in? ...of course they do. I wonder who they stole it from.

given how terrible it is they probably actually built it themselves

well if I'm in charge of shield now maybe I'll just order them to crash it into something.

that works too